Lily Collins writes honest open letter to her father Phil Collins and forgives him for 'not being the dad I expected'
Lily Collins has penned an honest open letter to her father, musician Phil Collins, and written about their relationship in a new book.
Writing in her book Unfiltered, the Golden Globe-nominated actress said: "Many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad."
In the open letter she said she forgave the Genesis drummer for "not always being there" and "not being the dad I expected", the BBC reports.
Collins left Lily's mother Jill Tavelman when the actress was five, and she said a "terrible disconnect" developed between her and her father - who has four other children - as she grew up.
"He may have still been alive, but most of the time it felt as if her were completely gone," 27-year-old Collins wrote in the book. "I knew he loved me, yet he wasn't physically around to tell me.
"He assumed everything was always fine because I never said otherwise. It established a detrimental pattern. And I've realised that many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad. It's taken me more than a decade to resolve some of them (others I'm still resolving) and to finally build up the courage to speak my mind to him."
In the open letter, the Love, Rosie actress also assured her father that she will always need him and "always be your little girl", but added: "We all make choices and, although I don't excuse some of yours, at the end of the day we can't rewrite the past. I'm learning how to accept your actions and vocalise how they make me feel.
"I accept and honour the sadness and anger I felt towards the things you did or didn't do, did or didn't give me.
"I forgive you for not always being there when I needed and for not being the dad I expected. I forgive the mistakes you made. And although it may seem like it's too late, it's not. There's still so much time to move forward."
Collins encourages readers to share her letter with their own fathers, or to write their own.
Lily Collins: Phil Collins was 'not the dad I expected'
Lily Collins says it was "painful" that her musician father Phil was absent from much of her childhood.
In her new book Unfiltered, the Golden Globe-nominated actress writes: "Many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad."
She also penned an open letter to the Genesis drummer, saying she forgives him for "not always being there" and "not being the dad I expected".
Collins left Lily's mother Jill Tavelman when the actress was five.
'Building up courage'
In her book of essays, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me, the 27-year-old star explains her father then moved from England to Switzerland, where he stayed for more than two decades.
"He may have still been alive, but most of the time it felt as if he were completely gone," writes Lily. "I knew he loved me, yet he wasn't physically around to tell me."
She says a "terrible disconnect" developed between her and Collins - who has four other children - as she got older.
"He assumed everything was always fine because I never said otherwise. It established a detrimental pattern.
"And I've realized that many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad. It's taken me more than a decade to resolve some of them (others I'm still resolving) and to finally build up the courage to speak my mind to him."
The Mirror Mirror and Love, Rosie actress - nominated for a Golden Globe this year for Rules Don't Apply - encourages her readers to share an open letter she wrote with their fathers, or to write their own.
In it, she assures her father she will always need him and "always be your little girl", but also tells him: "We all make choices and, although I don't excuse some of yours, at the end of the day we can't rewrite the past. I'm learning how to accept your actions and vocalise how they made me feel.
"I accept and honour the sadness and anger I felt toward the things you did or didn't do, did or didn't give me."
She continues: "I forgive you for not always being there when I needed and for not being the dad I expected. I forgive the mistakes you made.
"And although it may seem like it's too late, it's not. There's still so much time to move forward."
Lily, whose book is published by Ebury Press on Tuesday, ends by saying: "I love you with all of my heart, more than you'll ever know."
Writing in her book Unfiltered, the Golden Globe-nominated actress said: "Many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad."
In the open letter she said she forgave the Genesis drummer for "not always being there" and "not being the dad I expected", the BBC reports.
Collins left Lily's mother Jill Tavelman when the actress was five, and she said a "terrible disconnect" developed between her and her father - who has four other children - as she grew up.
"He may have still been alive, but most of the time it felt as if her were completely gone," 27-year-old Collins wrote in the book. "I knew he loved me, yet he wasn't physically around to tell me.
"He assumed everything was always fine because I never said otherwise. It established a detrimental pattern. And I've realised that many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad. It's taken me more than a decade to resolve some of them (others I'm still resolving) and to finally build up the courage to speak my mind to him."
In the open letter, the Love, Rosie actress also assured her father that she will always need him and "always be your little girl", but added: "We all make choices and, although I don't excuse some of yours, at the end of the day we can't rewrite the past. I'm learning how to accept your actions and vocalise how they make me feel.
"I accept and honour the sadness and anger I felt towards the things you did or didn't do, did or didn't give me.
"I forgive you for not always being there when I needed and for not being the dad I expected. I forgive the mistakes you made. And although it may seem like it's too late, it's not. There's still so much time to move forward."
Collins encourages readers to share her letter with their own fathers, or to write their own.
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| Phil Collins with his daughter, actress Lily Collins, at a party for the film Mirror Mirror in Los Angeles Getty |
Lily Collins: Phil Collins was 'not the dad I expected'
Lily Collins says it was "painful" that her musician father Phil was absent from much of her childhood.
In her new book Unfiltered, the Golden Globe-nominated actress writes: "Many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad."
She also penned an open letter to the Genesis drummer, saying she forgives him for "not always being there" and "not being the dad I expected".
Collins left Lily's mother Jill Tavelman when the actress was five.
'Building up courage'
In her book of essays, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me, the 27-year-old star explains her father then moved from England to Switzerland, where he stayed for more than two decades.
"He may have still been alive, but most of the time it felt as if he were completely gone," writes Lily. "I knew he loved me, yet he wasn't physically around to tell me."
She says a "terrible disconnect" developed between her and Collins - who has four other children - as she got older.
"He assumed everything was always fine because I never said otherwise. It established a detrimental pattern.
"And I've realized that many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad. It's taken me more than a decade to resolve some of them (others I'm still resolving) and to finally build up the courage to speak my mind to him."
The Mirror Mirror and Love, Rosie actress - nominated for a Golden Globe this year for Rules Don't Apply - encourages her readers to share an open letter she wrote with their fathers, or to write their own.
In it, she assures her father she will always need him and "always be your little girl", but also tells him: "We all make choices and, although I don't excuse some of yours, at the end of the day we can't rewrite the past. I'm learning how to accept your actions and vocalise how they made me feel.
"I accept and honour the sadness and anger I felt toward the things you did or didn't do, did or didn't give me."
She continues: "I forgive you for not always being there when I needed and for not being the dad I expected. I forgive the mistakes you made.
"And although it may seem like it's too late, it's not. There's still so much time to move forward."
Lily, whose book is published by Ebury Press on Tuesday, ends by saying: "I love you with all of my heart, more than you'll ever know."
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